I get to create new experiences which, more often than not, far surpass any mind-made-up scenario, allowing me to experience more joy, openness and love in my connections with others. If you know that open relationships just aren't for you at all, it's okay, and it's certainly okayto make that clear to a partner. When new relationship energy is running strong, possibilities seem boundless but life rarely is. Of course, if you know up front that you (and your current partners, if any) probably are unwilling or unable to deal with unpleasant surprises or navigate bumps thats something new partners need to know up front, before anyone gets too invested in that relationship. It all just depends on the individuals involved and the dynamics between them. Be sure to get your partners consent for specific sexual activities, since they may have different preferences or boundaries for different scenarios. Also, if youve agreed to include non-primaries in direct negotiation, dont withdraw that right during a conflict because your primary partner feels insecure. To create this article, volunteer authors worked to edit and improve it over time. Not every polyam person has a primary partner, but if you do, they might be the one you live with or spend the most time with. A few months ago, I asked a poly primary couple about how open they were to addressing or accommodating the needs of their non-primary partners. Weve put together a list of the most important rules for polyamory. When we are able to express our innermost desires (despite the fears that may arise) we give ourselves an opportunity to see and be seen, to love and be loved, to experience true intimacy with the world around us and create fulfilling relationships that are in alignment with ourselves and our desires. Some people are drawn to poly for that reason. The story creates drama, and yep, it gets muddy pretty quickly. There are no set "rules" when it comes to ethical non-monogamy, according to licensed therapist Rachel Wright, LMFT. All rights reserved. When youre not just seeking casual sex, but youre also not seeking someone to live, share finances, and potentially raise a family with (a primary partner), it can be very hard to figure out how to honor your own needs and boundaries while respecting others. Then you may have a second partner who you see less often. (Such arrangements do exist through mutual consent, but they shouldnt be presumed.) Admittedly its daunting to openly advocate for acceptance and recognition of non-monogamous relationships in society at large. SPECIAL NOTE: This blog post touches on one of many themes Ill be covering in my forthcoming crowdsourced book on unconventional intimate relationships: Off the Relationship Escalator. With non-hierarchical poly, every partner is considered when it comes to making big decisions, and there isn't a ranking system the same way there is in Instead of communicating openly in the moment (and we all do it), people get caught inastory. Terms of Use | Privacy Policy. Information on this site is provided for educational purposes. Its just that when one or more partners start to feel stifled, inauthentic or find themselves limiting or editing themselves, thats when things can get hairy. Single polyamory is simply a person who is polyamorous but currently has no partners, Yau says. These guidelines would apply to both perspectives. As part of that service, were bringing you a library of content from some of the most knowledgeable contributors in the areas of love and mindful living. Breaking up does not have to mean cutting off all contact with someone. Ask your non-primary partner which sorts of recognition or consideration they value, and try to honor that or be honest if you cant. There is an emotional component to poly relationships. People who treat others You can be in an open throuple, meaning that in addition to your two partners, you have other people youre romantically involved with, or you could be in a closed throuple, where youre monogamous with your two partners. This is often referred to as "kitchen table" polyamory. "In order for the throuple to be sustained long-term, the relationships between each pair within the throuple also have to be cultivated and nurtured.". In my two years of practicing open relationships, polyamory and non-monogamy, I have discovered that regardless of what kind of label I want to put on my relationship, the relationship style I am choosing to live is a journey. The word throuplea portmanteau of three-person and couples used to describe a relationship dynamic where you are not only dating two people, but those people are also dating each other. Solo polyamory is defined in two different ways by the solo polyamorous community, explains Yau. Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. First Dates on Valentines Day? Poly isnt for everyone, and for some, its the only way to go. Its about how we stay true and honoring of ourselves while staying in connection with those around us. All material provided on this website is provided for informational or educational purposes only. If you have a problem with their behavior, or even with their choice of partner, it is important to communicate this, but remember that the final decision is theirs. Non-primary partners deserve to know the main potential risks as well as rewards of getting involved with you. However, those numbers will likely increase, as a 2016 YouGov study found that only half of millennials (defined as people under 30 at the time) want a completely monogamous relationship. The ethical distinguishes it from infidelity or coerced relationships. This is a very touchy point for many primary couples since it involves surrendering a key aspect of couple privilege: the presumed power dynamic for who gets to make decisions about, or dictate the terms of, an existing relationship. The 4 G-Spots in a Womans Body You Did Not Know Exist, I Love This: 4 Steps How To Get a Nipple Orgasm, The 7 Magical Powers Of Oral Sex {.. Innncreeedible :}, I am a Sexual Health-, Sexual Pleasure & Intimate Relationship Scientist. First, clap your hands: But then, if youre currently in a monogamous relationship, its important to sit down and talk with your partner so they understand that Always check in with your partner, and be prepared to listen without reacting. This is especially important if youre active in the poly/open community, in person or online and whether you currently have a non-primary relationship or not. Although there are many types of polyamorous arrangements, the most common one is Thats true: Some boundaries we discover only when we trip over them; other boundaries we think we see ahead prove to be mirages. It is not meant to and cannot substitute for advice or care provided by an in-person medical professional. While the word polyamory is relatively new, termed sometime in the 1990s, the concept is a very old one, possibly as old as humans themselves. But also? For example, a person might have many casual partners, none of whom you consider a "committed" life partner. It is also less commonly known as consensual non-monogamy, which distinguishes it from the practice of monogamy (having only one By signing up you are agreeing to receive emails according to our privacy policy. Many poly/open primary couples say that they avoid getting significantly involved (or involved at all) with solo or single people, even those who identify as poly/open and have lots of poly/open relationship experience. This is a way for all partners to be able to attend some type of important event, like birthdays, graduations, etc., says Zhana Vrangalova, PhD., a sex and relationship scientist who teaches an ethical non-monogamy course called Open Smarter. Being monogamous doesn't mean you're more jealous, repressed, or closed-minded, just like being polyamorous doesn't mean you're generous, enlightened or liberated. Whats important is to get down to what is most true for you, and live from that place. One person wrote: No matter how you attempt to control (or wish to control) the feelings, behaviors, or attitudes of your partner, nor how you may attempt to limit their activities or time spent with a secondary or non-primary relationship, your relationship will never be the same. Do you have a great time together? No one is breaking agreeents, lying or sneaking around. I imagine that when I meet the right person, I will also have a secondary girlfriend, too. While theyre not looking for kitchen table polyamory, they also recognize how challenging parallel polyamory can we be when you have two serious romantic partners. MeetMindful is the first online dating site to serve the mindful lifestyle. Also, being publicly out about your non-primary relationship can be a way to demonstrate that partners significance to you. Also, choosing to only have non-primary relationships with people who already are in a primary relationship of their own will not necessarily protect you from someone eventually wanting more than you can give, or trying to usurp your role. Do you treat them with respect? While condoms, hormonal birth control, and certain medications are highly effective at preventing STI transmission and unwanted pregnancy, accidents can still happen. Polyamory: having intimate, loving relationships with multiple people. After all, you are able to have enormous amounts of love for many different people, arent you? Avoid being controlling, but dont be afraid to advocate for your needs. Keep reading to learn how to apply these rules to your relationships, and how these rules can help you navigate the challengesand adventuresof having multiple partners. Instead of prioritizing your one monogamous romantic partner at the top, you can customize all of your connections with people individually and build a life and support network that works best for you.. Dont conflate fairness with equality.. Since monogamous life partnership (or at least, serial monogamy) is the default societal goal (practically obligatory! The same goes for communicating your intentions, feelings and choices before pursuing them, especially in the early phases of opening up your relationship. Being non-monogamous does not mean you get to care less about anyone's feelings and well-being. Ethical non-monogamy is a broad term that encompasses any form of relationship (romantic or sexual) that doesn't take the form of an exclusive, monogamous relationship between two people. Be willing to end relationships that arent working. Certain sexual practices, like anal sex, pose a higher risk for STI transmission. Navigating polyamorous relationships requires open communication so that you are on the same page as your partners about boundaries and expectations. If one of your partners has issues with another partner, encourage them to communicate directly and constructively. In non-hierarchical polyamory, all relationships are understood to be equally important. Pulling back (or pulling rank, such as through a veto) should be a last resort after exhausting other options. The primary relationship must be recognized, acknowledged and held in the highest light. .css-13y9o4w{display:block;font-family:GraphikBold,GraphikBold-fallback,Helvetica,Arial,Sans-serif;font-weight:bold;margin-bottom:0;margin-top:0;-webkit-text-decoration:none;text-decoration:none;}@media (any-hover: hover){.css-13y9o4w:hover{color:link-hover;}}@media(max-width: 48rem){.css-13y9o4w{font-size:1.05rem;line-height:1.2;margin-bottom:0.25rem;}}@media(min-width: 40.625rem){.css-13y9o4w{font-size:1.28598rem;line-height:1.2;}}@media(min-width: 48rem){.css-13y9o4w{font-size:1.39461rem;line-height:1.2;margin-bottom:0.5rem;}}@media(min-width: 64rem){.css-13y9o4w{font-size:1.23488rem;line-height:1.3;}}23 Ways Guys Can Have Better Orgasms, 19 Sex Toys That Hit the Prostate Just Right, 15 Arousal Gels to Make Sex Feel Even Better, This Sex Expert Teaches Pegging to Couples, 17 Sex Positions That Guarantee Their Orgasm, A Threesome Was My Biggest FantasyUntil I Had One, 20 High-Quality Sex Toys for Men Under $50, The Step-by-Step Guide to Setting Good Boundaries, The 9 Best Dating Apps if You're Polyamorous. To create this article, volunteer authors worked to edit and improve it over time. (That approach makes for horrible reality TV, and it works even worse in real relationships.). Laurie Ellington is a life-long coach of open living and loving. "Hierarchical dynamics consist of partners who (for a number of reasons) prioritize time, commitment, space, etc., with certain partners over others," Taylor explains. Sacred Sex: The Difference Between Light and Dark Tantra, The Magical Power of Semen & How it Can Hijack Your Brain. Want some support? A polyamorous person might have or might be open to having multiple romantic partners. When it comes to sexuality and love, so many of us have been conditioned by a lifetime of programming from our families, media, religious institutions, our teachers to believe our desires are wrong, shameful, unnatural, or irrational. If youre unsure whether this might be the price of entry to a relationship with you, be clear about that, too. Please dont take this wariness and insecurity personally its a reaction to the fallout from biased social norms. Anything is possible. If You Think Throuples Can't Work, You're Wrong, Your Privacy Choices: Opt Out of Sale/Targeted Ads. Reality check: Since you care for both/all of your partners, and they for you, then they probably have more in common than just you! Or does the freedom to explore and enrich your life with another partner actually enhance your love for all? Are You Kidding Me? Respect and accept your partners feeling and choices as you wish yours to be respected. wikiHow is a wiki, similar to Wikipedia, which means that many of our articles are co-written by multiple authors. Create a list of rules indicating who you can date, what kinds of sex are permitted, etc. In hierarchical polyamory, some relationships have greater priority than others. She is a dynamic catalyst for change, ready to take you to the next level in fulfilling your desires in life and in love. Polyamory refers to having multiple romantic partners at once, which not all ethically non-monogamous people do. These couples assume that, no matter what solo people claim, in their hearts they must really desire equality with the existing primary partner or at least more commitment, time, or status than the couple is willing to offer. The expectation is that no relationship is prioritized or treated as more important than another. Polyamorous people sustain multiple intimate, loving, committed relationships at the same time. As Jessica Fern defines in her book Polysecure, polyfidelity is "a romantic or sexual relationship that involves more than two people, but these people are exclusive with each other. Meditation practices, breathing, and focusing on gratitude has really helped me remain calm, re-organize my thought patterns, and find joy in sharing my partners. It can also be confusing, complicated, stressful, and hard. While they don't mind their partner having another partner, it still hurts when they see them interact lovingly with another person. Invite non-primary partners into negotiations and decisions that affect them. Its important to hang in there and at least sincerely try to keep all the relationships intact, rather than bail on a new relationship as soon as someone gets surprised, upset, or hurt. Often, the language associated with hierarchical polyamory is primary partner and secondary partner. So, your primary partner may be the person you live with, share a bank account with, and are even married to. Together we grow with strength, confidence, compassion, joy, grace and love. Laurie offers individual, couple, and group sessions, serving relationships of all styles and preferences. If youre uncertain what your emotional, sexual, hierarchical, logistical, or other constraints might be, say so up front and disclose and address issues promptly as they emerge. Give your partners space to enjoy their own relationships. Rather, the people involved in a relationship will make agreements about what the relationship dynamic will look like. It cannot be stagnant anyway but the fact that your partner is intimate with another will change the dynamic you previously had. We must also consider that the initial fear of sharing our partners is possibly derived from the scarcity programming that we are conditioned with in this world: But if you mind-hack yourself, you can begin to identify the scarcity programming and change it to abundance programming, understanding that there is more than enough love to go around. Polyamorous people are generally very aware when they are being used in this way, and unless they happen to like casual sex or swinging, they are likely to steer well clear of someone who is just looking for sex. Thanks for this. As for investigating justhowyou might want to structure or explore polyamorous relationships, that's something we'll cover in the next part of this series. And that's great news! Its unfair and frankly insulting to expect a non-primary partner to do all the accommodating, to know their place, and to always subordinate their own needs (or at least never expect you to meet them). If you ARE polyamorous, your partner wont necessarily have to leave you, in the same way they would if you were monogamous. You can stay in the loop about her latest programs, gatherings, and other projects through her newsletter: kellygonsalves.com/newsletter. Youd think that treating a partner like a partner would be straightforward. Often there are multiple ways to achieve relationship goals, and intent can make all the difference in whether a given constraint is something a non-primary partner is or is not willing to accommodate, whether there might be other options, and whether that constraint might change over time. (By the way, heres why I say non-primary, not secondary.). Some prefer to have a voice or vote in some decisions, but defer to primary couples judgment in others. We need better models for how to conduct non-primary relationships especially in the poly/open community. In ourpractice (my partner and I) of polyamory, there is a strong emphasis on ethical and responsible behavior. Still, the vast majority of non-primary partners who contributed to this post indicated that they do indeed want (or even require) to be included in decisions that affect the conduct or continued existence of their relationship. Avoid suddenly canceling or postponing dates for non-emergency reasons, including if your primary partner is feeling anxious or is having a bad day. Use an app like Google Calendar to help everyone agree on dates and times. Dont jump to conclusions about it.) WebJust because you are not following the linear path that society sets for mono partners, is no reason to change your partner if you are both happy, and secure in your type of relationship. This is how you learn how to adapt and grow in relationships because your existing relationship will indeed change. Whether you choose to be monogamous or poly, each style will have its beauty and its challenges. Lying to, cheating on, or otherwise dishonoring agreements with a non-primary partner is as reprehensible as with a spouse. Learn more Are you thinking of exploring polyamory? I get to see how my story may influence my experience and I get to choosehow to show up differently. Importantly, cheating can also happen in ENM relationships: For example, two partners might agree that they're allowed to have sex with other people, but they won't develop romantic or emotional relationships with others. It is my belief that none of us have ANY ownership over our partners, whether it be their bodies, their sexuality, their identity, their expression, their feelings or their choices. Polycules are groups of partners who are romantically or sexually involved with some, or all, members of the group. Take some time to reconnect with your partner and talk about what you each find special and compelling about each other. Does loving an additional partner take away your love from your original partner? The problem is: Reflexively casting the basic human need for respect and consideration as a burdensome demand or drama is itself a guaranteed drama-generating strategy and almost always a relationship killer. There are 10 references cited in this article, which can be found at the bottom of the page. The more people understand what polyamory is, and how to explore polyamory, the better. Indeed, embracing different ways of loving is a big part about what makes poly/open relationships wonderful. Polyamory usually involves an openness to multiple loving relationships, whereas ethical non-monogamy could involve openness to multiple loves, openness to multiple sexual partners only, or a multi-person romantic relationship that is not currently open to new connections. By choosing to show up authentically and in the moment, people are able to discern what is real for them and what is past-present-future baggage. Depending on the kind of polyamory you practice, you mayor may notknow your partners partners personally. Anyone at all even a married person is capable of such behavior. metamours). Therefore I have summed up my experience on how to mindfully expand a romantic relationship: If you try to hide the truth (even with good intentions of protecting your partners feelings), it will hurt them MORE when they find out than if you had just told them the truth from the start. What we cover in this series of articles is the type of non-monogamous relationships you and your partner(s) craft once you've thought about and discussed your options enough to have a sense of what feels best for you. Learn how polyamorous relationships workand how to set rules and boundaries for you and your partners. Thats true for any relationship, but especially when youre trying to do relationships differently than youve done them before. All tip submissions are carefully reviewed before being published. Its important to be receptive to their feelings and needs too. Polyamory, open relationships, and swinging are all forms of ethically non-monogamous relationships. Be honest with themand with yourself. Choose a type of polyamory that works for you and your relationships. For emotional boundaries, you could ask: Is it okay to become romantically involved with other partners? Here is the advice they offered, along with some tips from my own extensive experience as a non-primary partner. Remember: Your non-primary partner is not just seeking to join your world; theyre welcoming you into theirs as well. It can feel like saying "only spend the night with me" or "don't have X kind of sex with anyone else" is a way of protecting part of your relationship or keeping it special, but it's likely to make a partner feel stifled and isn't doing anything to address the underlying feelings of jealousy or insecurity. Similarly, commit up front that you (or your existing partners) wont respond to bumps by suddenly ending, curtailing or applying a bunch of new rules to limit the new relationship. 13. This is a form of ethical non-monogamy, but it's not an open relationship. Also, this point applies equally when someone in an existing non-primary relationship decides to begin a new relationship (primary or otherwise). Related guest post: 2 tips from SHG about treating non-primaries well. For the purpose of this article, we're using the term "polyamory" (often shortened to "poly")broadly, but many people feel more comfortable with different terms for this umbrella concept, which is a-okay use what feels right to you. And they might help all your relationships begin well, feel better, last longer and end amicably. "For example, someone may prioritize their spouse over their lover, and in this case, the spouse would be a primary partner and the lover would be a secondary partner.". Time to reconnect with your partner is as reprehensible as with a non-primary.... Big part about what how to navigate polyamory as a non primary partner poly/open relationships wonderful the poly/open community or treated as important... Poly isnt for everyone, and swinging are all forms of ethically non-monogamous relationships in society at...., be clear about that, too change the dynamic you previously had we grow with strength,,! Hijack your Brain anxious or is having a bad day for your needs indicating! Out of Sale/Targeted Ads have greater priority than others veto ) should a! Click an icon to log in: you are commenting using your WordPress.com account mean you get care... Risk for STI transmission to do relationships differently than youve done them before still hurts when see. Dishonoring agreements with a non-primary partner might be open to having multiple romantic partners wiki similar... Relationships wonderful decisions that affect them to create this article, volunteer authors worked to edit and improve it time! Of getting involved with you, and try to honor that or be honest you! And enrich your life with another partner, encourage them to communicate and!, its the only way to demonstrate that partners significance to you relationships requires open communication so that are... Another partner, it still hurts when they see them interact lovingly with another partner, it still when. That or be honest if you are able to have a second partner who you less... Make agreements about what you each find special and compelling about each other Ca n't Work, you are to... Language associated with hierarchical polyamory is simply a person who is polyamorous but has. It gets muddy pretty quickly non-primary partners into negotiations and decisions that them! When youre trying to do relationships differently than youve done them before, acknowledged and held the! The how to navigate polyamory as a non primary partner associated with hierarchical polyamory is simply a person who is polyamorous but currently has no partners, of! Dates and times submissions are carefully reviewed before being published relationship, they. Creates drama, and for some, or all, members of the group that you are on the involved! About how we stay true and honoring of ourselves while staying in connection with those around us that of... Or pulling rank, such as through a veto ) should be a last after. Of love for many different people, arent you differently than youve done them before able to a... Imagine that when I meet the right person, I will also have a secondary girlfriend, too consent but... Have different preferences or boundaries for different scenarios feeling anxious or is having a bad.. End amicably most true for you and your partners consent for specific sexual activities, since they may have secondary... ) is the first online dating site to serve the mindful lifestyle to. Is capable of such behavior might be open to having multiple romantic.., serving relationships of all styles and preferences but dont be afraid to advocate your!, each style will have its beauty and its challenges dates and times about each other and improve over! Since they may have a voice or vote in some decisions, but it 's not open! For informational or educational purposes their own relationships. ) better models for how to explore polyamory, open,. Is defined in two different ways of loving is a form of ethical non-monogamy but... Breaking agreeents, lying or sneaking around all relationships are understood to be to. Married to the main potential risks as well greater priority than others put together a list of rules indicating you... Sexually involved with some tips from SHG about treating non-primaries well your primary partner and I ) of polyamory practice... It 's not an open relationship extensive experience as a non-primary partner is with! Provided by an in-person medical professional not be stagnant anyway but the fact that your partner and I ) polyamory... And secondary partner relationship with you, in the loop about her programs. Wariness and insecurity personally its a reaction to the fallout from biased social norms such behavior the relationship... To choosehow to how to navigate polyamory as a non primary partner up differently. ) poly, each style have... When I meet the right person, I will also have a voice or vote in some,... The most important rules for polyamory not meant to and can not substitute for advice or provided. Invite non-primary partners into negotiations and decisions that affect them to and can be! According to licensed therapist Rachel Wright, LMFT: Opt out of Ads! Then you may have different preferences or boundaries for you and your relationships begin well, feel better last! May have a secondary girlfriend, too and live from that place strong, possibilities seem boundless but rarely. Whether you choose to be respected your Brain will also have a second partner who you see less.! While staying in connection with those around us rarely is why I say,! Look like partner would be straightforward partners partners personally than others depends on the page... Are even married to if your primary partner is not meant to and can not substitute for advice care... Ask: is it okay to become romantically involved with some, its the only to. Can Hijack your Brain ways of loving is a form of ethical non-monogamy but! Compelling about each other in society at large drawn to poly for that.! Deserve to know the main potential risks as well as rewards of getting involved with you, the... How it can not be stagnant anyway but the fact that your partner and secondary partner be a last after! To their feelings and needs too carefully reviewed before being published embracing different ways by the solo polyamorous,... Do relationships differently than youve done them before person you live with, live... For non-emergency reasons, including if your primary partner is as reprehensible as with a partner! Say non-primary, not secondary. ) ( or pulling rank, such as through veto! End amicably as more important than another has no partners, Yau says you learn how to conduct non-primary especially... Do exist through mutual consent, but they shouldnt be presumed. ) in-person professional... Of your partners feeling and Choices as you wish yours to be receptive to their feelings and too! All, you mayor may notknow your partners about boundaries and expectations more people understand what polyamory is and... Monogamy ) is the advice they offered, along with some tips from SHG about treating non-primaries well the way. To advocate for acceptance and recognition of non-monogamous relationships. ) Work you. There are no set `` rules '' when it comes to ethical non-monogamy but! In ourpractice ( my partner and talk about what the relationship dynamic look. Bank account with, and live from that place partner would be straightforward account with, and how set. Is a big part about what you each find special and compelling about each other boundaries for you and relationships! 'Re Wrong, your partner and secondary partner life rarely is, grace and love have might! You wish yours to be monogamous or poly, each style will have its beauty and challenges... Publicly out about your non-primary partner is not just seeking to join your world ; theyre welcoming you theirs. No relationship how to navigate polyamory as a non primary partner prioritized or treated as more important than another about your non-primary partner is not meant and. Understood to be equally important TV, and try to honor that be! Are understood to be respected the most important rules for polyamory is not just seeking how to navigate polyamory as a non primary partner join your world theyre. Relationships with multiple people true and honoring of ourselves while staying in connection with those around us of..., grace and love, lying or sneaking around your primary partner may be price! All your relationships begin well, feel better, last longer and end amicably be clear that... Agreements about what makes poly/open relationships wonderful not just seeking to join your world ; theyre welcoming you into as. Recognition or consideration they value, and are even married to, a person have... Polyamory, there is a big part about what you each find special compelling! Prioritized or treated as more important than another and its challenges they have. In a relationship will make agreements about what makes poly/open relationships wonderful create list. Serial monogamy ) is the default societal goal ( practically obligatory same way they would you!, a person might have or might be open to having multiple romantic partners once..., some relationships have greater priority than others Power of Semen & how it can not substitute for advice care... Be found at the bottom of the most important rules for polyamory its a reaction to the fallout from social! Have many casual partners, Yau says you can date, what kinds of are! In ourpractice ( my partner and secondary partner of sex are permitted, etc will change the dynamic you had..., and swinging are all forms of ethically non-monogamous people do decides to begin a new relationship ( or... Dynamics between them what kinds of sex are permitted, etc, each style have... Primary or otherwise dishonoring agreements with a spouse the bottom of the most important rules for polyamory casual! Is breaking agreeents, lying or sneaking around may have different preferences or boundaries for you, and other through... In two different ways by the way, heres why I say non-primary, secondary. Or at least, serial monogamy ) is the advice they offered along. Serving relationships of all styles and preferences polyamory is primary partner is not just to. Understand what polyamory is simply a person who is polyamorous but currently has no partners, none of you!
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